Presented With one small Comment.

Photo by JR

The spine! 

(Thanks, JR!)

Some news!

And here we are, at a Friday once again. I hope you had a manageable week, at the very least, and have some awesome plans for the weekend.

A few bits of news. I got a real, actual day job, which shouldn't take me away from this blog, but may get hectic from time to time, so if I do forget to post, I want to apologize in advance. I don't think I will, but you just never know what happens when you're busy making TV.

Also, I recently started blogging about plus-size fashion for Lucky Magazine! I am CRAZY excited about this, and I would love for you to check out my first post for them, which can be found here. I'll be posting over there once a week, so check back in. I will also be posting links here on Fridays. Because I'm pushy like that. I invite you to follow me across the interwebs.

Your usual reminders: Please keep an eye out for misspelled signs and grammatical errors. You can send them my way via email, Facebook, or Twitter.

Thanks, y'all! Have a great weekend, and see you Monday!

Meeting, party of one.

Over the past few weeks, JR has sent in a number of, shall we say, problematic submissions from her kid's school. I suppose it is a small saving grace that the teacher has not limited his/her bad influence to the kids.

Photo by JR

Yes, this once again features your old nemesis, Comic Sans. I say your because I don't really have any strong feelings about this font, but I understand that many do. And it does appear to be a meeting for one parent. I wonder if that parent knows. 

UGH. I understand that parents don't always have a choice in what school their kids attend, but if you were employed at this school, and wanted it to stay open, wouldn't you market your product a little better? I mean, you don't want the parents to flee when they realize the level of education therein, right? Sure, the education isn't for the parents, but they're essentially the consumer. They're the ones that make the decisions. Wouldn't you want them to be happy with the product? Like, this is EXACTLY what you're selling, school. Don't you want to be demonstrably good at it? 

I just don't get it. Sometimes learning this stuff is hard, sure, but you really do expect the TEACHERS to have a grasp of it. Right? 

(Thanks, JR!)

What do these things have in common?

Sometimes, submissions are easy to figure out. Where it came from, what it meant to say, that sort of thing. And sometimes, I'm just completely stumped. My friend IU sent this to me, and I was kind of assuming it was an ad on Facebook, but in looking at it again, I'm not so sure. I can't remember an ad that said "show more." Anyway, it doesn't really matter. This thing is a bit of a mess. And perhaps IU will tell us where she found this in the comments. Take a look:

Photo by IU

There is no better moment than a spelled- and punctuated-incorrectly maligning of education. It really brings it all full circle. Or perhaps this person is trying to make a point. If someone had just cared about his or her education, this wouldn't have happened. I'm sure the STUDENTS involved care, as well as their teachers. Hopefully this person leaves the teaching to teachers, and steers clear of any classroom. 

We can discuss the surprising health benefitS of ginger some other time. 

(Thanks, IU!)

Not quite as planned

Today's submissions come to us from two people who know each other in real life, and not just on the internet!

My friend MAB took this at MessHall, which is in the same building that one of the old Brown Derby restaurants used to occupy, back in the day. Based on the prices and what they're serving, I'd guess that this restaurant wants to be one of those hip, laid-back, kinda pretentious hipster-y joints. It is in Los Feliz, after all. So, you'd think with this pedigree, they might go out of their way to spell all the words on the menu correctly.

Photo by MAB

Well, these guys managed to spell avocado correctly, so there's that. However, CAESAR has an a at the end, and not the e as shown here. Also, for the love of G-d, who puts avocado in a caesar salad? Barf. And goat cheese? COME ON. Way to make this salad something I will never partake of. Just throw some olives on there and be done with it.

HOWEVER, a piece of good news. In her email to me, MAB said that the error was also online, and that the friend she was with let the restaurant know of the error. And lo and behold, when I went to check the online menu just now:

Well, crap. 

CAESAR is spelled correctly! They fixed it! Yay! Unfortunately, when they went in to fix it, they had some sort of bad reaction or spasm or something, and ended up jacking up a couple of the other words, so, hmm. This is awkward. Do we say anything? Or just leave it, to protect the rest of the menu?

SHHHH! No one say anything! Just put the menu down, and back away slowly.

Spelling Palsy. Lethal to the sense-making of your menu.

(Thanks, MAB!)

What's for lunch?

Sometimes I like to think about what I'd serve if I had my own restaurant. Likely, it would be a mishmash of all my favorite foods, assembled together with no rhyme or reason. I mean, come on. If you hired a chef, wouldn't you have that person cook your favorites daily? And a pizza/pasta/sandwich/pastry shop doesn't sound SO bad, does it? It would have to include places for you to assemble your own of all the above. Well, except for pastries. Let's leave that to the experts. Sometimes, the hoi polloi come up with good ideas for foods, right? It doesn't always require a professional food preparer. And food is one of those things that's SO personal. No one thinks of themselves as "The Person who Enjoys Disgusting Foods Sprinkled on a Pizza," but at least one of your friends thinks so.

So, when I first saw this sign sent to me by my friend ND, my first thought was that the sandwich sounded ALMOST good. SO CLOSE.

Photo by ND

I mean, I have my suspicions about egg white on a sandwich. Or even egg whites. Whatever. Also, I loathe AVOCADO, regardless of how you spell it. It always tastes vaguely of paste to me. And I was not one of those paste-eaters in school.

Wait, is this a sandwich? Maybe it's a scramble, like the item above. Just served with whole wheat toast. I don't know. I like that on the item above, they felt the need to clarify that the spinach was, in fact, a tortilla. I don't know about you, but I was totally expecting that business to show up wrapped in spinach leaves. Tiny baby spinach leaves.

Another thing I'm compelled to point out is that this sign writer has exquisite handwriting. Mine looks nothing like this. Doctors are unable to read my handwriting. I learned to type as soon as I could so I would no longer have to write anything down. My handwriting looks the way the adults on the Peanuts sound. Unintelligible and ultimately unnecessary. Which is why I think this is more of a shame. Such pretty penmanship shouldn't be wasted on misspelled words.

So sad. But I am kinda hungry now.

(Thanks, ND!)

More childhood trauma

In keeping with today's theme, here's a pic JR took of something she spotted in her kid's classroom. She's starting to worry about his education, as she's been the source of a FEW of the classroom problems I've posted. Take a look.

Photo by JR

I wonder if the kids say anything. I mean, LOOKING isn't that complicated a word. Surely some of the kids notice that it's missing an I. Or is that part of the assignment? Or is the assignment just to know the colors? Because then I can see the kids not necessarily knowing how to spell LOOKING, if they're that young. Anyway, it's sad, right? Why is this teacher so uninterested in details? Does she teach everything this way? "Good job, Billy! You got 100% on this test!" "But I only got 7 of the 10 math problems correct!" "That's close enough!" 

Because we want to be a nation that's good enough. Awesome. 

I am TERRIFIED.

(Thanks, JR!)

A child's eyes

My friend HC spotted this on a child's toy, and sent it to me with the simple admonishment: "Proofread your toys, y'all. Come on." She's totally right. Check it out.

Photo by HC

I mean, seriously? We're just going to go ahead and spell things incorrectly on children's toys now? Because they can't read, right? So, whatever? That's fantastic. Maybe we should stop protecting them from other things. Like no more car seats, because they don't drive. Ooh, no more child safety caps because the medicine isn't prescribed for them. Yeah! Because kids are never curious, and they never pick things up when you're not looking.

HC included a second picture, so you can see how often this decal appears on the plane.

Photo by HC

Because if there's one thing I know about parenting, it's that reinforcing a bad idea is always smart.

Wait, what?

OY.

(Thanks, HC!)

En Francais, s'il vous plait.

I love all the blog submissions you guys send me. I really do. I appreciate you keeping an eye out for me, and sending me everything you can. But I have to admit that some submissions are, well, more awesome than others. Sometimes I just get a few typos in. And sometimes, they're like a gift from above. 

Spectacular.

This was sent to me by my friend ND when she spotted it on FB. It is a MARVEL. Look, no one likes a sale as much as I do. No one. But I admit I am put off by the shenanigans here. I mean, you and I know that ANNUAL is the correct spelling, right? That one's just silly, as it probably got caught by spellcheck. And down at the bottom, maybe if you're not local, you don't know that they're on FRANKLIN, and not whatever nonsense the sign says. 

But oh, then there's HORDERVES. 

I will grant you that's a great transliteration of the word. But I don't think you get to transliterate a word from a language that uses the same characters, do you? I mean, sure, for a pronunciation guide. But that's not what this is. No, this is an invitation. And on an invitation, it should probably say HORS D'OEUVRES. Since that's how it's spelled in French and all, sort of. According to The Internet, the French version doesn't have the final s in the singular or plural. I always want to put an accent circonflexe over the O in oeuvres, but that's not right. I only took 2 years of French. And it was a LONG TIME AGO. I'm doing the best I can. Also, I GOOGLED IT. 

C'mon. If you encounter a word like this, and you know it's a foreign word, and you've been told before you're not great at spelling, then why not just say appetizers? Light snacks? There are ways to get around the challenging Frenchy-pants word. 

ND also tells me that there's a banner advertising the sale in front of their store, and on that banner they've misspelled NATIVE. So, apparently, they can't even spell the name of their store correctly. 

Dark days, indeed. 

(Thanks, ND!)

Godspeed, Endeavour.

I have a strong connection to America's space program. I think I've talked a bit about that before. The retirement of the Shuttle fleet is bittersweet, but the excitement people have expressed over the various Shuttles has warmed my heart, and I've eagerly watched their dispersal throughout the country. When I heard one of them would be coming here to Los Angeles, I was thrilled! The Shuttle program is following me around! It just wants to be near me! It's been fun to watch my newer home get as excited about a Space Shuttle as my childhood home did. Last week, when the Shuttle did its flyover on its way to its new home, the local news was ALL OVER IT. They told us where we could watch the flyover, where to send pictures, what time everything was happening, and so on. 

Except for one fatal flaw.

It was super awesome. Not gonna lie. 

What you have to understand is that Endeavour is named for James Cook's 18th century exploration vessel. It is not the American English ENDEAVOR. It is ENDEAVOUR. And even the slightest google will tell you that. This is a case of spellcheck not being able to save you. Research is required. But really, this is one of those things that news agencies should get right, since it's right there in the press release. 

Still, it was pretty darn awesome to step outside of my apartment building, look up, and see Endeavour flying overhead. I can't wait to go visit it at the Science Center! 

(Thanks, CH!)

Presented Without Comment.

Photo by JF

(Thanks to JF and AW for alerting me!)

Friday!

Welcome to the weekend! It's great news, isn't it? It has been a WEEK for me. They've been renovating one of the bathrooms in my apartment. I was told it would take 2 days. It's been almost a week now, and they're still not done. FUN. I'm looking forward to a weekend of peace and quiet. And reading! I'm just finishing up A Discovery of Witches. What are you reading?

As a reminder, if you see any spelling or grammar problems while out on the town this weekend, please remember to snap a pic and send it to me! You can get to me by email, Facebook, or Twitter!

One small request. If y'all are going to send me a screengrab of an error on a website, please also send me a link to the page you found it on, if possible. That helps me go back and check to see if they've fixed it, or to grab a different image, in case I need to. Thanks so much!

Let me know what you're reading this weekend, keep an eye out for today's awesome Presented Without Comment, and y'all have a good weekend. See you Monday!

Street Justice

This was sent to me by AD, and was taken at her local county fair and rodeo venue.

Photo by AD

Aren't there a lot of kids at these things? Kids who will now believe with all their hearts that the word is SALLOON and not SALOON? That's tragic. Avert your eyes from the sign, kids! Let's start a stampede of our own! A stampede wherein we deface one of the Ls on this sign!

It's made of wood. We can cut one out and put it back together! Just like new. BUT BETTER.

You kids distract the security people. I'll bring my saw. IT'S ON.

(Thanks, AD!)

Never surrender!

I've never been married. I don't know anything about it. Subsequently, I don't know anything about divorce. I assume that it can be terrible. Stressful. Painful. A number of other -fuls. But here's what I do know. I expect better of the Washington Post.

Telling someone to not divorce is, to me, terrible advice.

HER'S? REALLY? For the record, my friend AW sent this to me two weeks ago, and I just went and grabbed that image today. So they've never fixed it. They've just left it there. The Washington Post!

I don't know, y'all. Some days, I think we're fighting a losing battle.

I have to go curl up in a ball now and rock myself to sleep while weeping quietly.

The WASHINGTON POST!

(Thanks, AW!)

It was THAT kind of a party

Here's how annoying I am now. I was over at a friend's house for her birthday. The party was winding down, and we were all standing in the kitchen helping to clean up. Well, everyone else was helping to clean up. I was scouring all the food items on the counter, looking for things I could post to this blog. Fortunately, I was successful. And not just a jerk who didn't help clean up. Sort of.

ANYWAY.

It was a very healthy party. 

Based on sentence construction here, MAYBE is incorrect. MAY BE, the modal verb, is what's necessary. If the sentence lacked the and after descended, then the adverb MAYBE would probably work.

If you're ever not sure which to use, the internet recommends swapping in the word perhaps to see if it works in the same spot. If it does, MAYBE is fine. If it does not, MAY BE is what you want.

I'll allow the typesetting wonkiness since they clearly wanted the text to fit in this space.

I'll have what she's having.

Currently being served at the Wild Horse Cafe in King City, CA:

Photo by MR

Don't you hate it when errant letters just slip in without warning? I mean, how did that little guy get there? And if that meal doesn't float your boat, you can, at the same restaurant, have: 

Photo by MR

They got both spaghetti and quesadilla correct, but whiffed on WITH. Also, I'm pretty sure it's WHIPPED cream, and not just whip, but perhaps that usage is acceptable? I'm not sure. 

I am, however, DYING to know what a dinosaur tender is. Many, many moons ago, I worked at Universal Studios. At the time, they were in the process of building the Islands of Adventure theme park, and I worked in a preview center for it, where we'd tell the public about the new park, and give them a taste of what it would be like. One of the Islands of Adventure is Isla Nublar, or Jurassic Park, as it's more commonly known. The part of the preview center that featured Jurassic Park was pretty cool. It had dinosaur eggs for the kids to play with, and descriptions of different dinosaurs, and as you exited, it sounded like a dinosar was chasing you. No lie. More than once, I had an ADULT come up to me after exiting and ask me how we were going to get the dinosaurs in the park, since they're extinct.  And I had to gently break it to them that the dinosaurs weren't real. You guys. Movie science fooled more than one ADULT. And now this restaurant is serving dinosaur tenders? There's probably some measure of confusion, is what I'm saying. 

(Thanks, MR!)

Does anybody know what time it is?

Look first! Jokes after.

Photo by JR

I dare one of you to walk into this store and be all, "I don't have a Tag Huer watch. I do, however, have a Tag HEUER watch." OR, you could be all "My watch says Longines, not Longine. Is that wrong? Can you scratch off the s? I want it to be correct. I'm embarrassed by the misspelling on my watch." 

Because for the most part, I don't think it's necessary to be a jerk about misspellings. But sometimes, they just really rub you the wrong way, and you snap a little. Am I right? I'm totally right. 

(Thanks, JR!)

School's IN!

There's something particularly heartbreaking about spelling fails at school. Especially the one your child goes to. No one wants to be confronted with the fact that the person teaching their child either 1) can't spell or 2) lacks the attention to detail to check the spelling of a document. What else will they not notice where your child is concerned? I can't even imagine how frustrating that must be. I mean, what if your kid came home with this in hand?

Photo by JR

Do you see it? Let me work my magic.

Voila!

It's spelled correctly earlier in the document, so clearly it's just a typo, but ugh. As I said, no one really wants this person to teach their kid if they don't pay attention to the little things. Also, this is a great example of spellcheck not being able to save you, because of course, FILED is a word. But it is not FIELD, which is the word that should be here.

This is just one of the million reasons I don't have a kid. Every day that my plants survive is a victory worth celebrating. I am so glad they don't have to be educated or clothed!

(Thanks, JR! Hope your kid has a good year in school!)

NSFW (no, really.)

I love advice columns. I would love to write an advice column some day, since I have Strong Opinions about how you should be living your life. What you should say. How you should act. What outfit you should wear to the event at the end of the week. But I love to see what other people say in advice columns. My favorites are the letters from the Letter writers who have no idea they're the worst humans on the earth. And then the kind advice-givers who try to gently break that news to them. But also awesome are the less-kind ones that lay it all out on the line for them. I am sometimes stunned that the person writing the advice column doesn't start every answer with "OH MY G-D YOU ARE SO STUPID." Which would be mean, for sure, and not very helpful, I guess. But satisfying? Absolutely. 

My friend AW sent me the link to one of those Pot Psychology advice videos from Jezebel. She sent me only the link and the timecode, and told me she'd let me make my own screengrab. So I played the video, and this is what I found at that timecode: 

Screengrab by me!

Now, I'm going to guess that this sign was made by the makers of the video. I don't know if they copied the question-asker's language directly in, so I'm not sure who to blame here. Regardless, question-asker, I can't help you with your official problem. Not in this space. However, PEELS is not the word you're looking for, my friend. It's PEALS. Like a bell. 

Also, I don't think the word "ticklesome" exists. There is a chance, Letter Writer, that your girlfriend is not laughing at what you think she's laughing at. Maybe she's just a grammar nut who's thinking of an email she got from you recently? It's possible. She's all "Oh, ticklesome. That's not a word! HAAHAHAHAHAHAAAHAA!"

Maybe? 

(Thanks, AW!)

An easy one

It's Monday morning. You're cranky. Me, too. Let's all take a look at this picture and talk about it.

Photo by AW, from "Lost Girl"

This comes to us from my friend AW. Captions are tough because they aren't always generated by a human. And sometimes, when they are, they're done on the fly VERY quickly. And I hate to beat up on anyone that's trying to get things done that quickly, because perhaps these tapes arrived at the captioning facility a little later than they should have. Anyway, point is, I don't usually roll with a caption post, because there are too many variables. However, who's vs. whose is tough for me, and I wondered what you thought. I have been known to completely rewrite a sentence just to avoid choosing between the two. For some reason, the rule never gets stuck in my head. And it's an easy one--basically the same as its vs. it's. Whose is the possessive. Who's is a contraction of who is. So, if it can be replaced with who is or who has, use the contraction. If not, use whose.

See? Easy peasy. Do you know of any other tricks that can simplify some of our more confusing rules? Please share!

(Thanks, AW!)

Presented Without Comment.

Photo by DM

(Thanks to AW and DM!)

At week's end

Friday! Yay! Have a fantastic weekend, y'all. I plan to.

As always, please keep an eye out for spelling and grammatical errors! The warehouse is looking a little bare these days, so I'd love to stock up and have plenty of tragedy with which to entertain you. If you see something, send it to me here, or tweet it at me, or send me a message on Facebook. It is crazy easy to be in touch!

As your good deed for the day, I hope you'll take a moment to send the Presented Without Comment post to a friend. Grassroots! Word of mouth! Gotta build the buzz.

Thanks to all of you who've stuck with me so far! I hope you're enjoying it as much as I am!

See y'all Monday.

The nose knows

I cannot do a scary movie. Just can't. I am a HUGE chicken, and can't handle it. It kinda makes me sad when some cool, hip scary movie comes out, and everyone's talking about it, and I know I'll never see it. I like to talk about cool things! I want to be in the know! I love water cooler talk! But alas. I am a coward, and am not up to the task. Which means I usually don't even bother reading any press about any scary movies. So, I would have never seen this tidbit if JR hadn't brought it to my attention.

Here's the headline for this story:

Oops.

No spelling errors here, except I love it when this kind of thing happens. The ads take over and eat the copy. I don't know enough about html to know how to fix this, but I suspect it's fairly easy. Anyway, here's the error:

This is one of those times when you're screaming at the screen, right? 

Listen, I get it. I HAVE a weird nose. My sneezes freak people out. They never know if it's a sneeze or a cough. But I don't think my nose is weird enough to be featured IN A HORROR MOVIE. And I would never expect people to run away from me. That seems rude. It's just a sneeze/cough. A snough, if you will. I don't do it on purpose! And it's NOT SCARY. Jeez. Just a little loud.

I know Hollywood is totally out of ideas, but this seems really desperate. A horror movie about a weird nose? LAME.

What's that? It's supposed to be NOISE? OHHHHH. Well, that's different. And probably really scary! I was almost willing to see this when it was about a nose. But now? Forget it. OUT.

I am now trying to come up with a really scary movie about a nose. Maybe your nose leads you places you shouldn't be, and then gets you into trouble? But where could it lead you? To a bakery? Or a coffeeshop? RUN BY AN EVIL BARISTA! A BARISTA OF SATAN! And then you have to cut off your nose! To spite your face! That seems horrible.

Still out.

(Thanks, JR!)

Back to school

There's a lot of business here that requires our attention. Have a look:

So confusing

JS sent it to me because of that whole THE HE wonkfest at the top of the second paragraph. But there are so many more treasures here to behold! Here are just a few that I see:

• In the first line, why is Year capitalized? WHY?
• Same line as THE HE: canine dogs? Because there are another kind? Actually, that whole sentence is terrible. What's with all the extraneous words? inside OF a portable classroom? Drop the OF. "...inside a portable classroom at Waterbridge Elementary School." With writing, less is almost always perfect. Anytime you can lose a word, do so. This isn't college. You're not trying to hit a word count. You want this as clear as possible. The next sentence is nearly as bad. "Deputies said they got word of..." Awful. "Deputies got word of the break-in..." Why do you doubt the deputies? 
• Here. I'm just going to rewrite the next little bit entirely: "Upon arrival, they surrounded the campus and eventually located the suspect ransacking classrooms, searching for items to steal." 
• In the next bit, the deputies have now become authorities, unless these authorities are different people, in which case they should have been identified. If they're the same, then they should still be deputies. Also, this writer is incredibly fond of calling them "they." This person clearly didn't take the same writing classes I did, where we only got one "they" a paragraph. And even then, we were supposed to make every effort to avoid it. It's very passive writing. Oh, and they wouldn't confirm whether it belonged to the suspect? OY. WHETHER OR NOT. You're missing part of the phrase. Either "they wouldn't confirm IF it belonged to the suspect," OR "they wouldn't confirm WHETHER OR NOT it belonged to the suspect." Basic diction, morons. 

Good grief. Do y'all see anything I missed? Here's the link to the original, in case you want to have a look. It is ROUGH. It's like the station was doing some sort of tour for kids, and had them write up some stories while they were there. Once the kids left, the station decided to go ahead and print the stories. Hey, free labor! Maybe they're friends with the kid, and just wanted to distract us from the story by being terrible writers.

Well done, them, I say. I am completely befuzzled.

(Thanks, JS!)

Spicy!

This submission comes to us via my friend AW, who spotted the original on her friend DB's Facebook page. He was searching for a restaurant of the same name in a different location, and stumbled across this item on the menu. As he said, I'm sure there are people who would pay a lot more.

Sounds delicious, no? 

Here's the link, by the way. The error is in the pdf version, and not online. Let that be a lesson to you, restaurants. NO ONE wants your pdf menu, and now that it's dragging you down, you might as well dump it altogether.

It's WONTON, in case you're unsure. Wanton might work for the transliteration, but as that word actually has a different meaning, I don't think I'd go with it. Best to just stick with wonton.

(Thanks, AW and DB!)

What happens in Vegas...

Just have a look:

Photo by DH

First of all, I just want to say that this drink sounds kind of disgusting to me. I'm not sure about the booze + ice cream combo. I'm also suspicious of the whole boozey milkshake trend. I feel like each of those ingredients is doing just fine on its own! I mean, I like ice cream. And I like booze. But do I like them together? Probs not.

Now that THAT'S cleared up, let's take a look at the spelling errors. First up is ELIXER. They got desert right, which is the tough one here. You'd think after that, ELIXIR would be easy. Especially if you've got a computer nearby. And then of course, there's the SOUVENIER glass. This is one of those things I think is really weird about Vegas. I know. There are a LOT of things to choose from. But this is one I've decided to glom on to. Why do you need a giant glass to remind you of that time you drank that giant drink? Does it go with your decor? Are you going to use it at home? You could passively-aggressively serve the jerk in your life a drink at dinner! "Hey! Before you insult my cooking or my home, why not have a drink? I got you this special glass. We'll talk again when you're done."

And don't get me started on the price. Seriously. I'm appalled you only get one glass for that price.

(Thanks, DH!)

Mmm, cheese.

My friend AS risked life and limb to take this photo IN TRAFFIC, so we will now respond appropriately:

Photo by AS

This one is a little tough to see. Let me see if I can do something about that.

Congrats?

WHAT IS THAT? That thing hanging down after the 2nd. Is it a comma? It's a THING, because it's also on their website (scroll to the bottom). They think it's supposed to be there. It's not. And it's crazy-making. Is it maybe some sort of remnant of the underline that was once underneath the nd abbreviation? Is it a vestigial tail on the d? Remember, back in the Cretaceous period, when ds roamed the earth, their great tails allowing them to balance in trees while they stalked their prey? They're totally domesticated now, but I guess now and then, those tails reappear, reminding us of their once-terrifying past.

Or maybe it's just a weird thing. Could go either way at this point.

I do definitely want a grilled cheese sandwich now, though. A LOT.

(Thanks, AS!)

HOW DARE YOU.

So, today we're going to look at things to which I have a disproportionately angry response. Basically, stuff that just makes me crazy. There is no reason for these shenanigans. For example, have a look:

That is a random shot of a phone screen, right? 

JUST NO. Why would you put the hyphen in the wrong place? Who STILL doesn't know how to format iPhone? I remember when iPods first came out, this really confused some people. They just really wanted to shove a hyphen in there for some reason. NO. Refer to the press materials. Check Apple's website. That bad boy is trademarked, and therefore, you're really supposed to format the name the way they want it, even if it looks weird to you. YOU DON'T GET A VOTE.

This should read, in my opinion, "iPhone Trade-In" I guess, for a lower third, we can capitalize all the words, just so they look the same. But honestly. This just drives me insane. STOP HALF-ASSING EVERYTHING, AMERICA.

Whew. I'm gonna go have a little lie-down now.

Emergency!

There's a grocery store nearby called Ralph's. It's a common grocery store around here. This one is nicknamed the Rock n Roll Ralph's. I THINK this is for two reasons. One, it's very near the Sunset Strip, and two, it's open 24 hours, so the rockers in the clubs on the Sunset Strip could make a pit stop at this Ralph's after their shows to pick up some Ben & Jerry's and wine on their way home.

Los Angeles kind of loves to nickname places in this manner. There used to be a Rock n Roll Denny's near me, so nicknamed for the same reason as the Ralph's. I'm also very near the Stabby Target, where people were stabbed by a random ill person. They're local landmarks. But I find the Rock n Roll moniker to be especially helpful when trying to locate a 24 hour location, because that information can become VITAL after 2 AM, at which point finding the closest place to get your Ben & Jerry's and wine can become a life-or-death situation. So, if you're a store that has fairly normal hours, may I humbly recommend that you have a sign out front that tells people where they can go for 24 hour service.

Like this one! Kind of.

Photo by JR

There are two locations listed, making LOCATIONS plural. I find it interesting that the verb is correct, but the noun is missing the s. It does, however, get an unnecessary capital letter. As did Nearest. By the time you're finished reading this sign, you will need to stop by the pharmacy for something to stop the burning in your eyes. At least you can run in at any time!

(Thanks, JR!)

Linkage

Good morning! It's Monday. You don't want to be at work. I don't blame you. Here are some links to ease you into your day.

There are a LOT of issues here, so much so that perhaps we can almost ignore the misspelling under the "White Graduates Only" section. And I'm pretty sure Homecoming is one word.
(h/t MLW, from Yahoo News and ABC News)

You may be similarly troubled by this link, which features another awkwardly painful racist moment AND a spelling error (on the left--CREAT jobs).
(h/t DW, from Breitbart.com)

And now, something lighter. For your ongoing reading enjoyment, check out this WTF Comcast tumblr full of the wacky things in Comcast descriptions.
(h/t JF, from WTF Comcast tumblr)

Another funny grammar blog for you to peruse.
(h/t DW, from Grammarly)

Check out this story about a Canadian school accidentally honoring Carnie Wilson. Oh, Carnie. Things are going to go your way.
(h/t JR, from E! Online)

And finally:

Spotted on FB

From my friend AD comes this cautionary image. Oh, Tay tay. Don't try to ruin the kids' minds with your bad grammar.

There. Don't you feel better? Back to work!

Presented Without Comment.

Photo by CG

(Thanks, CG!)

Milkshake!

Yes, I guess I'm not naming the Friday posts after foods I would like to enjoy. Friday! You know you love it. Big plans for the weekend? Maybe tell a friend or two about this here little blog? I would give you a hug if I could. Send a friend the link to this post! That way, they know how to connect, and where to send misspellings when they see them! Yay!

Have an amazing weekend! Curl up on the couch, watch a movie, have some snacks. Be sure to check back in later for today's Presented Without Comment, and I'll see y'all on Monday.

As always:

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Enjoy!

Foreign TV shenanigans!

The Summer Olympics have come and gone for another season, but the Paralympics are in full swing, if you're still hankering for some athletic competition! I didn't know much about the Paralympics, so I did a little googling, and found this wiki page, which would never lie to me. According to it, the Summer Paralympics have been held immediately following the Olympics since 1988, and the Games started as a small competition between British WWII veterans in the late 1940s.

The Paralympics don't enjoy the same level of widespread awareness that the Olympics do, but let's hope that's only because it's still working its way on to the world stage, and not for any other uglier reason. As the Games are held in the same city as the Olympics, there's still quite a lot of business going on in London surrounding them, and the Royal family has been out taking part and supporting the athletes. It's tough to find a Paralympics broadcast here in the States, but you'd think it'd be much easier in the UK. Alas, no.

Photo by CE

This is what my friend CE encountered when she tried to tune in to the Paralympics early on. Hopefully, they've gotten that sorted out by now. Also, hopefully, they learned to spell PLEASE at some point.

If this were in the US, this would totally be some sort of joke about British spellings. "This is how they spelled please in Medieval times!" And then they'd play Monty Python and the Holy Grail, so you'd forgive the bad joke.

It's somewhat comforting to know that British broadcasters are no better at spelling than their American counterparts, no? We may have done well with that Revolution thingy, but we haven't entirely risen above our roots yet. I also like how different this is from an American apology. I feel like you'd almost always get a phone number now, so you can call a specific place to complain, even though, because the sign is up, the broadcaster clearly knows it's not working. The Brits are just like "Eh, it's not working now. You can try again later. Maybe it'll be working. Maybe not. GOOD DAY."

Because if you finish with manners, you win.

(Thanks, CE!)

ZOMBIES, ZOMG

Are you excited about fall TV? I am. It's no secret I love TV, and fall is the time when the networks like to pretend they know what we, the viewing audience, likes, and so they drop a whole ton of, um, stuff, on us, and see what we respond to. What shows are you looking forward to? I like to try and give everything a look, and see what keeps me coming back.

My friend IU has been getting ready for fall by reading up on the new and returning shows, and spotted an error, one which has plagued us before. Have a look:

Screengrab by IU

And here's a closeup, in case you can't see it:

This show sounds very stressful.

In our previous debate, most came down on the side of gauntlet. (note: this "debate" was mostly on twitter.) But technically, gantlet isn't wrong, if not in popular use. What say you? Would you go with gantlet or gauntlet? For me, it would be a tough call, if there were actual zombies involved. Yick.

(Thanks, IU!)

YOUR TURN!

Because I am feeling a bit (ok, more than a bit) tired and lazy today, let's play a little game called Spot the Error! Here's your game board:

Photo by AD

Ok, I made the pic extra big so y'all can see. I'll start you off by pointing out the INCLUED underneath SANDWICHES up there. There are a LOT of problems here, so I expect to see the comments and the Facebook page blowing up, y'all. DO NOT FAIL ME IN MY TIME OF NEED. Feel free to include all the typesetting issues as well.

I got up to 10 problems and stopped counting. How many can you find?

(Thanks, AD!)

An abbreviated Food Wednesday

Yesterday, I took a tour of the LA River. Yes, we have one! Yes, there's water in it! We kayaked. You know what I learned? That you need stomach muscles to kayak for any length of time. You know what I don't have? Stomach muscles. As a result, today's posts may be, um, brief. I need to lie down. Y'all understand.

Look at this!

Photo by L

CHUNG CHUNG. Don't you think Law & Order when you see the word trial? And seriously, what does the description here even mean? "Cranberry nut & Treasure hunt" What? I do not want to find treasure in my TRAIL mix. What if you bite down on it and chip a tooth? That's just a hassle. That's a pretty stressful way to strike gold.

(Thanks, CG, and L!)

They're back!

Have you ever noticed how the shows on ABC Family develop a small but VERY LOYAL following? I mean, now that "Switched at Birth" has returned, I'm pretty sure I'm going to be able to survive the rest of the year. I feel THAT strongly about it. For some reason, I've never really gotten into any of their other shows. Maybe I've never quite forgiven them for canceling "Huge." And I've talked before about how they have a number of shows featuring lying. But what kind of a TV show doesn't involve lying in some way? After all, they hid the president's MS on "West Wing!"

ANYHOO, one of the things I think ABC Family does really well is promote their shows. They connect with the audience, and keep them involved, so they feel a part of what's going on, and therefore more invested. It's a great way to maintain a loyal audience! But what it also means is that your audience is going to be visiting your website a lot. Especially if you have new webisodes regularly. And when they get there, this is pretty much EXACTLY what you don't want them to see:

screengrab by HC

Ok, the error here is pretty tough to see, and I wouldn't have ever caught it in a million years, so thanks again to HC for keeping an eye out. Here's another screengrab that should illustrate this issue more effectively:

This one's by me. 

First, look at the caption. Then, look at the lower third in the clip. THIS POOR KID'S NAME IS BRANT, NOT BRAD. BRANT, ABC FAMILY WEB PEOPLE. NOT BRAD. (I call this guy a kid because he is 11 years younger than me, and while that still puts him well inside adult territory, I feel less old by doing so.) As HC said, he is too cute to be marginalized. He just wants some respect, y'all. He's been in town a few years now, and deserves nothing less. I've said this before, but as the owner of two names that sometimes stump people, I sympathize. You have to take the bull by the horns, so to speak. Stand up for your inherent Brant-ness! This is totally not a Brad kind of a thing. All Brant, all the time! VIVA LA BRANT!

I mean, when has a BRAD ever made it in acting? Please. Name one Brad. Ok, yeah. That guy. Name another! Ok, sure, there's that other guy. Name a third! WHATEVER.

The point is, this guy is Brant, and the web people should have maybe checked the cast list before hitting publish. Weekend be damned.

(Thanks again, HC!)

A follow-up

It's Tuesday. If you're in the US, you're back to work after a 3-day weekend. Sorry. I hope it was lovely! Let's get down to business, shall we?

First up, remember this post from a while back, wherein I, erm, borrowed a photo from a famous person? I credited him, and apologized, so I feel we're all good.

Recently, my friend HC sent me a pic of the SAME sign. BUT THERE'S MORE. More to the sign, anyway. Take a look.

Photo by HC

THE TRAILER IT IS ATTACHED TO IS JUST AS HEINOUS AS THE SIGN ITSELF. As HC said, "hi priced ticket" indeed. Hi, there, ticket! This is just a tragedy towing a travesty. And I don't have any idea who it wants me to vote for. The most important bit, the dude's name, is the smallest font, and too tiny to see from the passing car.

I just can't even. My brain is starting to feel a bit explodey. Need nap now.

Wake me when the election's over.

(Thanks, HC!)

Politicked off.

Did y'all see this? After Todd Akin said that...thing, he updated his website. You can see the progression here. It's really sad, y'all. Focus in on the line highlighted in red. The first version is there in the link, using the wrong YOUR. The next version is here:

Umm...

Well, that's, um, closer, I guess. You can just imagine the shouting in the office, can't you?

Staffer 1: "There's supposed to be an RE at the end of that word! Are you stupid?"

Staffer 2: "What? No way, dude. What do you want me to do?"

S1: "Fix it! It's supposed to be apostrophe RE, you moron!"

S2: "Dude, I will totally fix it."

And of course he added an apostrophe RE to the end of that word. Because he is awesome. At being some very important person's nephew.

And here is how it looks right now.

Good job.

So, they finally figured it out. I wonder how many tries it actually took. And how many people. I still think there should be a hyphen on pro-life, but I get that people are rolling without them these days.

Now get out there and vote! Ok, well, not RIGHT THIS SECOND. You can't do so right now. But when the time comes. Be ready! It'll be fun! You'll get a sticker! Who doesn't like stickers?

(Thanks, AD!)

Internet error roundup--YEEHAW!

Good morning! I hope you're enjoying your day off, if you do have it off. If not, I'm here to provide you with a little distraction, in the hopes that your day passes a little more quickly. Hope it helps!

My friend JS has a number of diverse interests that keep her busy surfing the internet for updates. Over the past few weeks she's encountered a number of minor errors in her web travels, which she sent on to me. I know that the internet is now a place where just any loser can set themselves up as an expert in something (AHEM), but again, if you're working for some sort of a corporation, or, really, just trying to get your own ideas and concepts out into the world, then you might take the time to proofread your work. That way, people visiting your site will NOT think "HAHAHA, you are a stupid company and I wish to have nothing more to do with you or your products. Better check Facebook." They will instead think "I am intrigued by your ideas and wish to sign up for your newsletter. Please, tell me more."

On to the errors!

Screengrab by JS

Do you see it? Up there in "Today's Top Picks." It's the first entry. I can't even guess at what it's trying to say. What ticks have Lime Disease? What ticks have to do to get Lyme Disease? I dunno. So weird.

Screengrab by JS

Bottom left-hand corner. "...Then Roles Onto Passenger's Lap." Look, having a BOULDER roll into your car is traumatic enough. They could at least spell ROLLS correctly.

Dude. A BOULDER. That's nuts.

Screengrab by JS

You can see the entire story here, dated August 20, which has still not been corrected. And for the record, a WARM day with few clouds sounds perfect for a sail, no buts about it.

Screengrab by JS

This one's a little tougher to see. It's in the first line of the second paragraph. "Orange County Sheriff Deputies say the he was..." WHAT? I'm guessing it should possibly read "Orange County Sheriff's Deputies say THAT he was..." I'm not 100% sure about either of these corrections, but they make sense to me. Maybe they're called sheriff deputies. I don't see anything on the internet like that, though. And really. You don't need the THAT in that sentence at all. It's extraneous. So sad. An error that could have been avoided altogether!

So, as you can see, it's tough for JS on the internet. I'd suggest getting off the computer for a bit and reading a book, but we've seen the problems with that path as well. Go for a walk! Yes, get out and enjoy some nature. That sounds very peaceful to me!

(Thanks, JS!)